


First Kiss

by Kittie



Category: Supernatural
Genre: End!verse, M/M, Tumblr Drabble Transfer
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-02
Updated: 2015-01-02
Packaged: 2018-03-04 20:48:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 360
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3088886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kittie/pseuds/Kittie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The first time Castiel asks— Balthazar denies him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	First Kiss

The first time Castiel asks— Balthazar denies him. 

Castiel is a shattered creature looking for solace in anything he can lose himself in. It’s  _tragic,_  it’s like looking into a mirror that Balthazar can’t  **stand.**  He wants to rebel against what Castiel has become. He wants to shake him until he realizes all is  ** _not_**  lost— 

 Except  _it is_. His grace is flittering out, he’s more human than angel and nothing on this earth can prepare him for what is happening to the creature he loves most out of all of creation. 

When Castiel asks for something more— Balthazar denies him. He refuses to help Castiel in his endeavor to lose himself— to lose hope. (  _but there is no hope, dean winchester decided for the entire world to destroy hope_  ). 

It takes far too long, Balthazar finds, to let Castiel in once more. He built walls to keep the ache of his grace away from his mind but Castiel is injured & Balthazar falls right back into the cycle of helping Castiel. He expects nothing in return. 

He, honestly, doesn’t. 

It’s not until Castiel looks up to him with mud covering his face from a fall. He has a nasty gash that Balthazar  ~~wastes~~  uses his grace to fix the bleeding wound. Light eyes meet and Balthazar opens his mouth to berate the man on his need to hurt himself when Castiel wont take no for an answer anymore. 

They have been closer on so many levels and ways. 

That doesn’t stop Balthazar from groaning at the sensation of physical meeting. Castiel’s lips are chapped and he finds he likes that more than the idea of smooth flesh he was used to back before they were all utterly screwed. 

          "  _ **C** ** _a_ s…**_ " 

Balthazar whispers against Castiel’s lips. This isn’t right. They really shouldn’t be doing this ( even if Balthazar craves to do nothing more than to kiss Castiel until he’s flushed and keep going and going— ) 

          " I won’tlet you use me. " 

_I can’t let you use me._

They both know Balthazar’s one true weakness is Castiel. 

The blond can only hope Castiel wants him as more than a coping mechanism.  


End file.
